perma-anon post

[polizei]

Leave me an anonymous comment pouring your heart out. Say anything. Tell me your stories, your secrets, those things no one ever asks but you want to tell. Tell me about your love, your hate, your indifference, your joy. Tell me about what's inside of you when you're reading through these entries on your friends list, and tell me why you continue to come back here. Tell me anything. Tell me what you really think of me or yourself. Anything.

Post anonymously [by selecting the anonymous box]. Speak honestly. Post as many times as you like. One faceless wonder to another. You don't have to be on my friends list. You can just be stopping through. It doesn't matter.

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

okay, so, I've run through a few different ways of phrasing this in my head when I was trying to decide if I wanted to post this at all, and it really never turned out the way that I wanted it to, so I'm just going to go ahead and write this out and hope you don't think it's too weird or rambling and creeper-ish--

basically my first question is, did you go through your plurklist a while back and just...clean a lot of people out, unless you were still actively friends with them or some other criteria? I kind of disappeared a while back, and ended up missing pretty much everything from the past year or so, and...obviously I completely understand if you de-added me for simply not being there, because my plurk was basically a waste of space at that point - and even if that wasn't the reason then I would understand that, too, because obviously you've got to do whatever makes you the most comfortable. but - it still kind of hurt, to come back and see that I'd been cut, when I noticed it, and it made me wonder if there was something specific I did back then that made you delete me or not.

and if that did happen, then that's fine, there's no hard feelings, and I'm really sorry for whatever it was I did to upset you, or if it was even just a matter of being connected with people you didn't want to associate with anymore. either way, I wouldn't ask you to re-add me or anything if you didn't want to, because like I said, I was gone for a really long time and I'm not sure if we even play from the same fandom anymore. and it's not like we were super-close or anything back then - I'm not positive that you'd even remember me at this point, which makes this so much weirder, and if you were one of the others I'd known at the time then maybe I wouldn't bother doing this - but I'm still kind of, stupidly irrationally anxious about it, a little, because (and this probably sounds weird, and isn't really any of my business at all) around the time I disappeared, you seemed like you were really in a bad place and just having a hard time in general whenever we talked - and I always sort of wondered at the back of my head, if you've been doing okay since then.

obviously I've got no right to be worried when I was the one who wasn't around and didn't do anything to reach out and maybe try to figure out if your situation was better, but still, whatever happens I do sincerely hope that things have improved for you, and that you've been happier since the time we were friends ♥

oh my god why is this post so long AS IF THIS WASN'T WEIRD ENOUGH ALREADY; you really don't have to respond at all to this, seriously

[polizei]

if i've defriended people on plurk its probably because they haven't talked to me, so if you were one of the people who wasn't active on plurk for whatever reason then i probably defriended you just for that reason.

there have been a lot of periods in my life where i've just had...horrible times with dealing with my bad feels. i don't know how long ago we'd been friended or anything, but if you say i was going through a bad time back then, i used to do plurk cuts a lot because i thought people didn't really... want anything to do with me if they didn't talk to me. kind of my way of 'protecting' my feelings.

either way, if you're back now, and want to give things another go, just send me a friend request, anon ♥ i'm more than open to the idea.